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A blurred image of Souleymane Doukara, on the run from his own identity* *to any lawyers: this is a metaphor
Self-editing Wikipedia

Searching for Souleymane

Words by: Luke Brennan
Artwork by: Eamonn Dalton

“All units converge on point Alpha, over.” Dark black boots thunder against burning Mauritanian sand. “Careful, officers, this guy isn’t one to play around with, we’ve got a serious case of identity fraud and he needs to be detained, over.” Helicopters circle the perimeter, blades cutting through the clear blue sky.

“What is it boss? Who is this guy? Over.” The doors of the villa blast open, soldiers piling in.

“It’s Souleymane Doukara, kid, he claims he’s scored twenty goals in 23 games off the wing, over.”

“You fucking what, mate? Give, over!”

Souleymane, stop editing your Wikipedia page. You’re better than this.

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