If there was one thing worse than Leeds going down last season, it was Sheffield Wednesday coming up. A Yorkshire derby is fine and all, but so was being two divisions apart. We’ll just have to take the easy six points this season and move on, but first, what have the Wendies been doing with themselves while we were in the Premier League?

Last time

I could never work out what weird hex Garry Monk had over Marcelo Bielsa, but he claimed three wins and a draw with Birmingham City and Sheffield Wednesday. The damp 0-0 at Hillsborough in October of our title season was demoralising; losing 2-0 at Elland Road on a stormy January afternoon as our form was falling apart and everybody cried out for Che Adams felt like promotion being thrown away. It was okay, though, because a couple of weeks later we signed Jean-Kevin Augustin. He limped off in his debut in an Under-23s game at Hillsborough, but this was fine because, ‘according to the club … they have no concerns over his fitness’.

Their story since then

Wednesday fans wanted to go on the piss with their owner Dejphon Chansiri and they’ve had their wish. They were 6th when they beat us at Elland Road in 2020, but the Monkbot – who’d arrived in September to replace Steve Bruce – turned that into a 14th place finish. The chaos really set in during 2020/21, with a six point deduction for breaching Profit & Sustainability rules by selling Hillsborough Derby-style, wages going unpaid, three wins in eleven from Monk followed by one win in ten with Tony Pulis, and three months with Neil Thompson in temporary charge until Darren Moore came from Doncaster at the start of March. Anything good since then has been pretty much down to Moore, who got them into the League One play-offs two seasons running, making history last season by overcoming a 4-0 defeat to Peterborough in the semi-final first leg, then beating Barnsley at Wednesday. Back in the Championship, it seems like Moore made the mistake of asking for a pay rise, so Chansiri kicked him out, replaced him with Xisco, and went on a long rant about Carlton Palmer as if he was a Leeds fan circa 1994. Long rants are very much Chansiri’s thing: he clocked more than four hours at his most recent ‘fan forum’, which he opened by declaring previous fan forums ‘a waste of time’. Amazingly, the start of this season is the first time any meaningful anti-Chansiri sentiment has been heard at Hillsborough; an alarming number of Wednesdayites seem to think he’s doing a great job. I suppose we went through this with all the ‘Bates saved us twice’ nonsense, but still, people should learn from that, not imitate it.

Meanwhile, Barry Bannan has now made over 360 appearances for Wednesday.

Their situation now

You’re likely to have questions, as I did, about their shirt sponsor. The space that has been legendarily occupied by Chupa Chups, Mr Tom and Chansiri’s own businesses is now taken up by a drawing of a flat cap – although it helps to be told before you see it – and the words ‘Ey up’. Stereotypes, eh? EyUp is a ‘tech training organisation’ and has links to the biggest business story in Sheffield right now. With his wife Jane, EyUp is run by David Richards, who was founder and CEO of Sheffield data company WANdisco, which has been in the news because a rogue employee – not Dave! – allegedly fraudulently invented £88m of false bookings, meaning shares were suspended and investigations launched. Richards left his role after that, apparently not because of that, but neglected to mention on his way out that WANdisco were footing the £300,000 bill for EyUp’s sponsorship of Wednesday until after the shirts were printed and the deal was announced.

????️ Yorkshire!! Yorkshire!!

???? Sheffield Wednesday’s new home shirt features a sponsor called ‘Eyup’ with a flat cap as a logo

What do you think of the new look #SWFC fans? pic.twitter.com/JQ32TpCAFJ

— Football Heaven (@footballheaven) May 31, 2023

Whoever is paying for it is getting real value for their money, though! Wednesday are played four lost four in the Champo, and although they beat Stockport on penalties after a 1-1 draw in the first round of the Carabao Cup, they lost on penalties to Mansfield after a 1-1 draw in the second round. Pre-season must have been good though, right? Played seven, won one, drew two, lost four.

Always remember

There was a weird part of the 1991/92 season when Wednesday were trying to make the title race into a three club affair. Then Leeds – without Gordon Strachan and David Batty – went to Hillsborough and, live on television, thoroughly dismantled them 6-1. That the penalty from which Wednesday scored their ‘one’ was live on national television also means everybody in the country knows, to this day, that Gordon Watson is a cheat. The highlight, apart from Mike Whitlow’s header making it 5-1, was the way United responded to Watson’s cheating: one of the most beautiful goals of the Howard Wilkinson era. John Lukic throws the ball out to Tony Dorigo, who lets it roll in front of him and plays it first time down the line, curving into the path of Gary Speed, who is peeling away from his marker. Speed controls the ball with a touch of his right foot, then with his left puts in a perfect cross, dipping onto Lee Chapman’s head ready for a powerful redirection into the net. A simple joy.

Better to forget

After a 2-0 humbling in the FA Cup at Rochdale, Leeds went to Hillsborough in January 2014 hoping to restore some order. Instead, Marius Zaliukas put in an all-time chaotic performance at the back, Mathieu Smith lasted sixty seconds as a half-time substitute before he was sent off, and owners Gulf Finance House tried to sack manager Brian McDermott mid-match as Leeds lost 6-0. Then a gif I made of Jason Pearce crashing into Rodolph Austin became a meme on the Owlstalk forum as Wednesday fans made a lot of (actually pretty funny) remixes.

Sigh. It was still more dignified than the time Steve Evans missed a disallowed goal at Hillsborough because he’d gone for a piss. ⬢